We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
