Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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