So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
