i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I think my vagina is haunted
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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