I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
