Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
