every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
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