DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
