Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
