we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
