Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
