i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Randomize
