a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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