You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize