so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I will pee on everything he values.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
