No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
