I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
