Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
