So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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