Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
