I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
