Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
well you can't waste a boner
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
