i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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