Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
