is wine microwaveable?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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