Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
What a dumb baby whore.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
