I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Let's get the cat blown out
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
