So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
