I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I have feelings that need drinking.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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