when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize
