i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
