I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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