So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
ugly people sure do ruin things
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
