Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
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