help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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