I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
