every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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