Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
