she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Randomize