you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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