wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize