I hope mine doesn't look like that
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
