lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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