The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
