this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
