i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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