Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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