Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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