apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i think i scared a bird with my dick
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Randomize
