he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
