I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize